Mar 4, 2023

Shame...

I recently watched something on Facebook that really registered with me and felt led to share since I'm sure there are many others who have dealt with this same issue.

After Adam and Eve ate the apple they realized they were naked and they felt shame.  When God came to the Garden that evening to commune with them they hid from Him. They were ashamed of their nakedness. How did they know they were naked? Why did they feel shame for being naked? The devil made them feel shame. 

I recently realized shame was something I had been dealing with throughout all of my adult life and possibly even as a child. When I began to gain weight my boyfriend at the time referred to me as "fat". He wasn't the only one and even I have used that word to describe myself in the past. I felt shame in regards to my physical appearance. I became ashamed because the words someone else spoke over me. I believed the lie and allowed it to influence the way I viewed myself. I wanted to hide myself.  I didn't like people looking at me and constantly tried to prevent people from seeing me for what I really looked like. I went through a phase where I wore clothes that were too big and baggy on me thinking it disguised my true physical appearance. In all actuality, that made me appear bigger and gave me a sloppy look. Hoodies were often my security blanket and I would hide myself in them. 

I often refrained from participating in activities that I felt would expose me. One of my most favorite things to do is go swimming and for years I wouldn't go because I didn't want anyone seeing me in a swimming suit. I wouldn't wear shorts in public because my legs were thick and very white. I was ashamed of my body and put too much value on what others thought of my physical appearance. 

My life changed in so many ways when God woke me up in 2020. He slowly began to transform my mind and help me to see the places where the enemy had built walls of lies up in my mind. I began to focus less on my physical appearance and I began to see myself through God's eyes. Thank God I began wearing shorts again, because wearing jeans year round in Florida is not an option. 

Genesis 1:27 tells us that God created us in His image and Psalm 139:14 tells us that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. According to Ephesians 2:10 we are God's masterpiece. Zechariah 2:8 says that I am the apple of His eye. God loves me and the Bible makes it clear I am blessed and highly favored. If God be for me who can be against me? 

I am a work in progress. I'm still working on tearing down the walls of lies the enemy has spent a lifetime building, but I'm on the right path.

 I'm here to tell you that Jesus loves you. Do not allow the negative words of someone else to determine who you are or how you see yourself. Love yourself and don't be ashamed of who God has created you to be. Have confidence in knowing that you are a masterpiece created by God. Everyday look in the mirror and tell yourself I am beautiful. I am created in the image of God. I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I am loved. I am blessed and highly favored. Speak life over yourself. As you continue on life's journey, know that it doesn't matter what other people think when they look at you. What matters is who God sees when He looks at you and He sees you as His creation. 

I love you and pray that God has blessed you in some way through this writing. If you'd like to receive new blog post notifications you can subscribe. If you'd like to leave a prayer request or a testimony please feel free to do so.

May God bless you!

Much love,

Holly W <3 

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